Choosing Not To Reenlist

After services one August morning in 1861, Jay Nettleton and six others from Washington decided to volunteer. According to his account of that Sabbath morning each of the seven said "If you will go, I will..." In addition to Nettleton, the seven included Dwight and Fitz Hollister, Simeon Calhoun, Lucius Fox, William Black, and Harvey Perkins. Dwight and Fitz Hollister were cousins. Dwight and Jay Nettleton, according to their letters, were very close. Now, after three years of faithful service, three of the original seven decide not to reenlist. This was no small decision, given that virtually everyone else in their regiment of over 300 men has signed on for three more years.


January 3, 1864

The chief thought of the reenlisted men is of going home. Who wonders? Not a twentieth of them have seen home since they first left the State.

Fitz asked his parents if they wanted to see him home as a “Veteran”, and Preston roused himself to write the first words he ever wrote to him “No, Fitz we don’t want to see you home as a Veteran.” But while the question and its reply were transmitted, the question was solved practically, and sooner or later Fitz and William Black will appear among you as “Veterans”. I suppose you think I have not reenlisted. I have not. Neither has Dwight or Lucius Fox.

I have now received letters from Martha, Charles and you. Martha gave a willing consent that I should reenlist if I thought best, and conditions (were met) that involved my ability to allow her to share the inconvenience of camp life with me. Charles said “do not reenlist, by all means do not reenlist.” 

I made up my mind what course to pursue and that I would not break it - that I would not sell myself for the bounties, nor the pride, nor position.

I felt independent as a man. I talked independent, as I have not for two long years. I for once stood up and dictated terms that belonged to me. It did me good. I feel more of a man and should be more myself for the next nine months. 

My obligations to government do not become void until next October, in which time we have reason to hope something telling will be done to the rebellion.

If I allowed myself to be lead on to bind myself for three years more I might have occasion to think I had sold myself at the expense of friends—to say nothing of the paltry barter I received in lieu thereof. People may think that I am anxious to be free the service because I don’t renlist..

It is not at all certain but that I may reenter the service if I am needed, though I acknowledged in my own mind that the chances are against it . I believe it to be a higher ground to take ~ that is, to say that government can have my services if she needs them nine months hence without money or price, than it is to reenlist now.

I think Fitz yielded in an impulsive moment and now wishes it might have been otherwise. He won’t acknowledge any such thing. The money had no influence on him, neither any paltry motives but those of interest to the country. He fell or stood on himself. His parents ought not to count on him as specially theirs. He is his own man before God and must act as an independent individual. Parents think they need children when they can do without them.

It is generally understood that the llth and 8th are going to Hartford together on the same boat to New Haven. It is possible I may know exactly when they are to leave here before I send this. 

We have church services out in the open air - God’s free temple. The Chaplain preached a good sermon exhibiting the style of manhood he is possessed of.. He reminds me of Buck that once belonged to our Company. The virtue of a man seems to be in the encasement of flesh. I will send you his last sermon to his parish - in justification of his course. You will see in it an unvarnished man, one of action rather than of words. His wife is here also. She believes in drafting so that the Copperheads will have to bear some of the burden someway—money or person.

COPPERHEADS:

A pejorative name for Northerners who opposed the war and sometimes worked actively to undermine the war effort.


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